My mum doesn’t understand Twitter.

Nor does she understand Facebook.

In fact, my mum has a hard time understanding the nature of the Internet, period. For her it is simply another research tool that she turns to if none of her books offer a solution.

She said to me recently, “I don’t understand why people spend so much time on the Internet chatting and sending messages to each other when there are real-life people they can be friends with. Local communities are breaking down because no one socialises with each other offline anymore.” (Mum is a church minister so she sees lonely, isolated people every single day).

I tried to explain that using the Internet does not make you unsociable. I still have friends in “real life” that I spend a lot of time with. I tried to explain the appeal of finding people online who share your interests and who “get” you. Most of my family and friends know about my online work, but hardly any of them really understand it. On the Internet I can hang out with people who understand the true geek girl inside me!

Mum did concede me that point, but she is still sceptical. She would rather be at a church barn dance than sitting in front of a computer. I would rather stick pins in my eyes than do-si-do with a bunch of pensioners! And when I talk about someone as a friend and then reveal it is someone I know from an online community that I have never met “in the flesh”, she isn’t the only one in my circle of family and friends who looks at me like I’m crazy.

I can understand Mum’s point about communities breaking down. If the old lady down the street gets sick and can’t get out of bed, who is going to notice if none of us talk to each other in real life? Actually, that happened in our street but thankfully, even though I live in a city, we are still pretty good at looking out for each other.

I don’t think the break down of communities is the fault of the Internet; there are just so many contributing factors, and to blame one aspect of modern life is short sighted. The people I communicate with online are almost all sociable, outgoing people who seem to have incredibly busy offline lives. Many of them are active in their churches, charities and their communities.

Even on the Internet, where we can’t see each other properly, like attracts like. The people who would annoy me offline are probably the same people who annoy me online. It’s impossible to social network and hide who you are – eventually the real you is going to shine through.

Anyway, I mention all this because I have noticed this week, more than ever, how supportive and strong the online community can be. I see people Twittering that they haven’t seen someone around for a while, and everyone using their contacts to find out what has happened to them; I see a friend back on Twitter who I haven’t heard from for a few weeks and feel so much better for knowing she is OK; I see folks rallying around to help charities; groups of people adding their voice to express disgust at something and MAKING A DIFFERENCE; appeals going out to help find missing or abducted children; positivity, support and concern all around.

Of course, with these great things also comes negativity, back-biting and moaning, but that’s real life. That’s what we see in our everyday lives too. Except online it is easier to turn those people off with the click of a mouse (oh how I long for an unfollow button in real life).

I have explained to my mum that the Internet is a reflection of society. We may find it difficult to talk to our next door neighbours for any number of reasons but, in general, humans are social beings who seek out kinship wherever they are. We thrive on communicating and sharing with others, especially those who have similar interests and beliefs. We seek out validation and respect for who we are and what we stand for.

That’s the future I see for the Internet as well, and especially for Internet Marketing. Increasingly, marketing online is becoming about nurturing communities. Slapping a long form sales letter on a website isn’t going to cut it with the average Internet user today. They want to know more about you, to be part of your circle (or to use the latest buzz word – part of your “tribe”) and to feel a connection and sense of affinity with you. They need to know they can trust you.

Beware the marketer who thinks he or she need only Twitter when a product launch is about to happen; who provides poor service and under delivers; who remains aloof, detached and unapproachable; who plans on making a quick buck and disappearing again.

At the risk of sounding mushy, I have the best friends and acquaintances both online and offline. You challenge my beliefs and thinking so I never become apathetic; you make me want to achieve more and encourage me to raise my game; you make me think harder, laugh louder and longer, and cry a bit too. So many times you have lifted me out of my grumpy moods. You remind me of what’s important in life but allow me to enjoy trivialities. Sometimes you annoy me or make me frustrated, but you seem to forgive me for my own flaws and weaknesses.

Start building your own community within your niche, listen to what they want, be yourself, and more will come…

Now, off to work on my mum again. Who knows, you may yet see the Reverend Marion Twittering!